A SOLDIER'S Beginning
by llxtiger13
Summary: SOLDIER is looking for new, young recruits. Addy, a young girl, wants to prove a point: Girls can be in SOLDIER, too. She has always wanted to do this, but is she willing to risk everything to get it? Is she willing to risk her life?
1. Chapter 1

**Note from the author:** This is my first fanfic, but not my first time writing. I didn't have an official beta, so please excuse any mistakes. I read this over a ridiculous amount of times. Please read and review, no ships in this story... yet. ;)

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**Ch. 1**

"_Remove yourself from the situation." _That's what my mentor always told me.

But here I am… At Shin-Ra, trying to _be _the situation… Kind of.

My mentor also always told me, "_If you start something, finish it."_

_To be a SOLDIER. _That's my dream. _To prove a point: that girls can be just as powerful as guys. That men aren't the only ones who should be crowned SOLDIERs._

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_My heart is pounding. What am I supposed to do if they find out? How am I going to explain myself to a First Class as to why I'm dressed like a boy? Would they assume I was impersonating a SOLDIER? Isn't that considered treason? At least they won't be able to tell right away. They're too busy with sign-ups…_

All of these things ran around in my head as I walked into the lobby of the Shin-Ra Electric Power Company. And, despite my better judgments, I all but tip-toed up to the sign-up sheet at the front desk.

"What name should I use?" I whispered aloud.

"Preferably, your real one," commented a man behind me.

I turned around slowly and found myself face-to-face with the First Class SOLDIER Zack Fair. I openly gaped at his large form. He was a lot to take in. His raven hair and bright blue eyes were tilted down to look at my face. I hoped that I wasn't blushing seventy different shades of red, but I knew for a fact that I was.

"That wasn't what it sounded like," I said, even though it was. _I can't believe this. I haven't even signed up yet…_

"Then what was it?" he asked teasingly. "I know you new recruits could be nervous, but c'mon, are you that scared of me? I won't bite you… yet." He laughed loudly and "patted" my shoulder. And what I mean by "patted" is that he almost knocked me off of my feet.

"It… I was wondering whether or not I would use my full name or the one that everyone calls me…" _That was smooth._

"And those names would be…?" His face held an amusement that I couldn't quite understand. He seemed to stare into my soul for those few moments that it took me to find my answer.

"Um…" _What names have nicknames…? Guy names…_ "My full name is Alexander Chromwind." As I said this, I tried my best to slightly deepen my voice. I don't think it worked. _Alexander Chromwind? Where did you get that name? The names of homeless kids book? This is ridiculous. I am so stupid._

"Alexander Chromwind," Zack tried the name out for himself. "That's quite the name. I could see why you would want to write down a nickname or something. If you did, what would it be?"

"Alex," I answered simply.

"Wow. No last name, huh?" he laughed again. "You must not know that there are probably a million other Alex's then."

"Um…" I stuttered. "I would use my last name… But that's usually what people call me…" _No one calls me that. I still can't believe I picked that name._

"Oh, well then, Alex Chromwind, the sign-up sheets are right here." He reached around me and lifted the clipboard from the desk and handed it to me. I picked up the pen that hung by a string and carefully jotted down my (false) name. I was going to have to write that name down somewhere so I didn't forget it.

I replaced the clipboard with caution back on the desk. The guy who sat there didn't give me a second look. I sighed inwardly. There was no reason to give me a second look, which was a good and bad thing all at once. If I didn't draw attention to myself, the more likely I was to be able to hide my gender and maybe slip through a few loopholes. The flip side was that I was less likely to impress anyone and really prove my point.

_I'll get there eventually._ I sighed out loud this time. By writing my name on that clipboard, I was practically chiseling out my fate on a piece of granite. _You win some, you lose some._ I shuffled over to one of the many lobby couches and plopped down. Zack had wandered off when I signed my name to the practically soul-binding contract… _But it's always just the sign-ups, right? If I really want out that bad, I can just really suck at the try-outs…_ But I knew that I was going to try my best. I had worked for over six months to get here, and even if I only got to the infantryman level, I would still prove that a girl could do this kind of work. Being a SOLDIER is more like the gold medal after you won a competition. I would stick with bronze if I had to.

After I thought for a while I realized that infantryman really wouldn't be bronze. It would be more like fifth place. _First, Second, Third, Rookie, High-Ranking Infantryman… _Yep, that would definitely be fifth place, not third. That was even if I was able to get to the infantryman level.

I ignored my own thoughts long enough to read some of the information papers they had passed out when I first came in.

**SOLDIER OPERATIVE TRY-OUTS**

**Boys aged 15-18 years**

**Official Date:**** Monday, February 15****th**

**5 p.m. in the Lv. 49 Training Room**

Those were the first words on the page… "Boys." Ha. They haven't even given out the rules and I've already broken one. My mother always said I was a rebel child. I'm almost positive she blames it on the fact that I don't have any siblings. I don't know how those two things are related, but she insisted.

I kept reading the paper. Most of it was the standard, "We have our own dental, health, and eye care insurance. Blah, blah, blah." The details were all a blur. I was still confused as to why they had these open try-outs. I mean, any "boy" aged fifteen to eighteen could waltz in here, sign-up, and try-out. These people must have been insane. Most boys learned about Shin-Ra SOLDIERS at an early age and then almost idolized the First Classes. They thought of them as heroes and the like. I'm sure every boy who even took an interest in SOLDIER was here today. They all wanted the same thing. _We _all wanted the same thing.

While I sat and thought myself to death, I noticed a few other new recruits that were talking to each other. I only caught some of what they said.

"Yeah! I've had about five years of training to get me here. I'm so stoked! I'm gonna be the next SOLDIER First Class!"

He sounded awfully excited about this whole thing. _Didn't these people get nervous? _All of these guys were so confident, like they already went through the try-outs, like they were already a SOLDIER. All I could think was, _God, I hope I can do this._


	2. Chapter 2

**Note from the author: **So, this is the second chapter :O

*No action just yet* Please read and review. Hope you enjoy.

_Something I forgot to do in the first chapter_: **Disclaimer: **I do not own Final Fantasy or its characters.

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**Ch. 2**

It was the morning of the try-outs. I had severely increased my training regime in the past week to prepare myself. It was an attempt to compensate for my "lack of experience." I know I didn't have years of training, but I knew that I wouldn't be at the bottom of the ladder, so to speak. I saw some of the guys at the sign-ups, they didn't look so tough. Don't judge a book by its cover. Even though I tended to give myself good advice, I seldom followed it. You could have called it a bad habit, I guess.

My previous mornings had consisted of me utilizing the extra time I had before school to train. My body was overworked and painfully sore most of the time, but I continued to push myself. _No pain, no gain._

When the time came for me to walk back into Shin-Ra, I was a little bit more confident. I was greeted by a rush of cool air when the front doors slid open with a hiss. I took a moment to look around the lobby, which was again packed with people. I was right when I thought that every boy who had ever heard of SOLDIER was going to be here. My confidence left me in a rush. Some of these guys were two or three times my size. _How am I supposed to compete with that? _

My list of concerns grew exponentially as I walked further into the lobby. I could just make out the table with the list of our names and how we would try-out. I was about ten minutes early, but it felt like I was the late-comer. I managed to push my way through the horde of overly muscled fifteen-to-eighteen year old boys to the table. _Since when were all of them this big? _ When I got there, I looked down at the lists. And, of course, since my name was close to the beginning of the alphabet, I would be 13th to go. I could only console myself that I wasn't the first one to go.

I was insanely curious as to how this would all work. It said everything would happen in the Lv. 49 Training Room, but they still had everyone cooped up in the lobby. I heard the nervous and excited chatter of all the guys behind me. Some of their conversations just sounded like they were bragging about themselves. _Narcissists, _I thought to myself. They might have had reason enough to brag, though.

I had to calm myself down if I was going to go through with this. I had to find a way to relax. _Breathe. _I found an empty chair towards the back of the crowd and sat down. _Think through your plan. _My plan really wasn't much of a plan. It was as simple as go try out and wish for the best. It was the best I had. I don't know why, I had about seven months since I put this whole thing (because that was the only thing you could call it at this point) into action.

My body was as "trained" as it could get with the resources I had. After all, a poor girl who lived in the slums didn't exactly have a gym membership. My mind then drifted back to my home. Back to my mother. She was the only person who supported me completely and without doubt. When I told her what I planned on doing, I was sure she would freak out. She simply told me, "If that's what you want, Addy darling, then try your best." She was always so laid back about everything. I knew I caused her so much worry in the past, especially since I started _this_. I was determined to make things better for her. If there was a way to conquer my dreams and give her a better life at the same time, I would do it.

SOLDIER seemed to be my only chance to do both, while only putting me at risk. It was a well-paying job that had a lot of benefits. I needed the health insurance, I needed the money for the bills. My mother couldn't work because she got increasingly sick in the past few years, and as her daughter it was my responsibility to make sure she had everything she needed. She took care of me my entire life; I was going to give back to her, through hell or high water.

In the past, I wouldn't have had to go as far as joining SOLDIER. Things changed so quickly though. My mother got sick shortly after my twelfth birthday. She still won't tell me the details about it. She said, "If I told you anything about it, it would just make you worry unnecessarily."

I learned in recent months though that she wasn't going to get better without medicine. We didn't have the money for medicine. We barely had enough money to pay the bills and keep food on the table. Whatever money the government gave us was used in a matter of days. Things were so ridiculously expensive. We learned, together, very quickly, that some things we thought were required for everyday life really weren't that important. We also learned that the things that were required for daily functions were to be bought first thing, along with paying any bills.

To me, home became less and less like home. It was more like a place to eat and sleep. Mom always tried her best, but we couldn't afford to be picky about where we lived and how we lived. My attempts to get a job all but failed. No one wanted to hire a fifteen year old girl with "no proper upbringing." _Who were they to say that I wasn't good enough?_ They assumed things that they shouldn't have. Their whispers were enough to chase me away sometimes. They said things about my mother, about me, about my father.

My heart stuttered. My father. I know only stories about him. There were no pictures in our run-down apartment, no certificates of his, no diplomas, no anything. He was a ghost, without a face or name… My mother didn't even tell me his name, only that he loved me very much and that he thought it was for the best that I didn't know about him… _Why shouldn't I know about my own father? _Sometimes my mother was cryptic.

Soon enough, those thing wouldn't matter. I would have done almost anything to escape the past, but I learned to just look forward to the future. The future was quickly approaching. They called out number eleven and I looked down at my watch and my shabby work-out clothes; I could feel the bandages that hid my chest, they were very tight. I almost couldn't breathe in them. That didn't matter though, it would be worth it soon.

I had calmed myself down a lot since they started calling out numbers for try-outs. I knew the world better than most my age and I would be damned if I wasn't going to use it to my advantage, even if it didn't give me much of one. They called out number thirteen.

_**My name is Aderes Shields and I will join SOLDIER.**_


End file.
